March 31st, 2010
Today i want to share with you a little recording I did back on St. Patrick’s Day. I ended up in a bar and decided that it would be a good place to try out some of the techniques I like to teach, such as conversation skills. Talking to people in bars becomes a lot more easy if you understand that they are there for the same reasons that you are (and that’s not just to get drunk)!
Love it! Well done Marcus that was pretty indepth. Excellent tips!
lol interesting… enjoyed watching tht tip, how wud you go about a group of people then?
Groups are pretty simple. Start by talking to the most receptive person and build up some rapport with them. As they warm to you their visible reaction ‘vouchsafes’ you to the rest of the group. Another tip is to look at everyone as you talk to suck them into your conversation. Check out my video next week when i’m talking to a group of people
I cannot see the video, it didn’t show up
Hi Claudio, not sure why that’s happening: what browser are you using?
Anyhow, here’s a youtube link that should play!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QUE1GPSQWxI
Hi Marcus, i’m using Chrome. Thanks for the link, it was amazing
And a great job also for your cameraman: i think it can be difficult to film you in a crowded pub, even more after a few beers
Hi Marcus! Your videos seem very genuine and I like them a lot! Could you make a video asking a super gorgeous random girl on a date? That would be awesome if she showed up (she might lie … and not show up) and she has to act really interested in you!
And btw it would also be great if she didn’t notice the camera! – (I hope I’m not being very demanding but that would mega great!)
Hi Mark,
Thanks for the video, this stuff really helps. I like how you take it step by step, it really makes it easier to follow and understand what’s going on. I still have one question though, what if I show up at the bar and am not super enthusiastic. Do you have a good way to get into the mood?
Thanks,
Luke
Hi Luke, making yourself enthusiastic is a very important concept and I’ll be covering that shortly in detail. Expect to see something along those lines during June/July!
Dear Marcus, I’ve got a question: What do you mean with “pacing their reality”? and why is that so important to do? Thank you in advance! Jaus
Hi Jaus
‘Pacing their Reality’ means that you feedback to the person what you believe they must be experiencing. You do this because it builds rapport with people quickly.
For example, if somebody looks like they are in a hurry, i say “I know you look like you’re in a hurry, but….” In other words you add a running commentary to their personal experience.
This helps demonstrate two things in a conversation: 1. It shows that you are socially intelligent & 2. It builds trust with them because you see what they see.
Hope this helps!